I fully agree, I'm quite 'technical', I tinker a lot and I'm OK with machinery, but I'm always paranoid -- in the case of carrying 1.2 tons on 2 or four points, my engineering mind is worried. i worry about the paving blocks, the stands, and sills being solid enough etc.
By experience, paranoia is good in general, it's probably even more so when it comes to not receiving 1.2 tons of metal on one's chest
I use Machine Mart 3 tonne axle stands currently £26.39 and advertised as a Car Mechanics magazine best buy. They are rock solid under the jacking pads. It's rare but I have had the car up on all 4 stands and it's still rock solid. Put a wheel or breeze block under the sill for fall back protection.
I jack under the front subframe and the rear axle beam. I leave the jack gently brushed up to the jacking point for extra protection.
The jack I use is a £120 Machine Mart quick lift.
It doesn't really get any simpler in terms of the tools you need and where to put them than that.
Other than to say do it on level ground and preferably concrete.
But if getting under a car isn't for you the tools you use aren't going to fix your concerns.
And no small part of it is taking a leap of faith it's not going to fall on you. Assuming you've put the thing in the air right.
If in that much doubt, under car work may not be for you. As I say, there is little that actually requires you to work under the car that you'd come across day to day.
And I wouldn't really call removing a sump plug working under a car
I'm not saying there's not an element of risk but it's really just in and out in a few seconds.
I've rebuilt the front of my project car using these tools and not come within a million miles of any safety issue - touch wood. That includes replacing the engine/gearbox and entire front end mechanicals.
If anyone wants a demo I'm happy to do it btw. I'm in Swindon.